Deeply chocolate pudding

March 14, 2011 § Leave a comment

Sometimes the world is awfully overwhelming and confusing.  I can’t understand it.  I have no hope of understanding it.  Why is it that sometimes really really terrible things happen?  How can I have been so infinitely blessed as to have been able to have spent the weekend surrounded by loving friends and family?  Marveling at the beauty of lakes, trees, snow, and mountains.  Belly laughing at stupid jokes or at each other as we careened down precarious slopes.  Passing plentiful bowls of food and bottles of wine to each other reveling in the sharing.  While, at the other side of the world our brothers and sisters were having the ground shaken out from under them, rocks falling on top of them.  The fall out of nuclear melt down besieging them.  There is no sense to it.  No sense that my little mind can make of it.

The world, life, is terribly beautiful and beautifully terrible.  I suppose this is part of what makes it all precious, the very precariousness of it.  It doesn’t serve us well not to accept the sadness as well as the happiness in life.  But, still.  Sometimes, I really just don’t think I can handle it.  Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “it’s going to be alright.”  And you know what?  Sometimes I think that’s just fine.  Sometimes we aren’t strong enough to hold all the joy and sadness, and there is no shame in that.

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