February 22, 2011 § 4 Comments
Life is a great teacher, and in my time thus far one of the things I’ve learned is there are some things you just don’t mess with. A mother bear with a cub, for example (and no, I didn’t learn that from Sarah Palin, it’s something you are indoctrinated with almost immediately upon moving to northern Minnesota). Or an irritated red squirrel (important life lesson: even adorable animals have teeth). Or Texas (I don’t actually know that one from experience, it’s just the word on the street). Or someone who has just woken up. I learned that last one by virtue of having a best friend while growing up who was a very determined late-sleeper. On weekends, come 1 or 2 in the afternoon her mother would start trying to wake her. After a half hour or so she would give up and call for reinforcements – that would be me. Now, in order to survive the charge of the (day)light brigade and live to be the alarm clock another day, I quickly learned a technique of whispering sweet wake-up songs in her ear and/or sitting on her head and then jumping back and doing my best to be very supportive but hands off while the newly awoken
volcano girl crankily adjusted to the general idea of being up.
Now, hand in hand with the understanding that you don’t mess with someone who has just woken up is the knowledge that you don’t mess with someone’s breakfast. Many of us simply don’t have the emotional coping mechanisms to deal with that. I’ve grown a lot more adventurous over the past few years, but I used to eat the same breakfast every. single. day. And so, I imagine that if, tomorrow morning come 6am, I tell you all “make these amazing chipotle pepper scrambled eggs for breakfast!!!!” about half of you will look at me with red loathing in your eyes while saying something like, “schnnerrrrummp blerrggh.” Which, in early morning speak, means “just give me my granola and yogurt and coffee NOW! Before I shove those eggs up your nose.” I’m hoping that the other half of you will be like, “booyah! Bring it on! I like a breakfast with a little heat.” But, to the first half of you I say, it’s okay. Deep breaths. It’s going to be alright. You can just make these eggs for lunch or dinner instead! But either way, you really should make them. « Read the rest of this entry »